Comments on: How to Bring Up Baby? (36+6)

By: Erin

Erin — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 22:27:24 +0000

Found your blog by searching for “Continuum Concept.” I think it’s true we can’t live like a jungle mama does, but I think the concept is still useful, as we think about what babies evolved to expect. But I think the best bet is to trust your instincts–for example, I think it’s instinctual to respond to a baby’s cries so I don’t read parenting books by people who advise otherwise. Good luck!

By: Mamma Mia

Mamma Mia — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 08:53:22 +0000

That’s just it. You should do what works for you. Who cares what works for everyone else. If the baby and you are happy, that’s what matters.

Another note on Claire Verity. She isn’t a parent, which makes me question her methods even more. I’m not saying that you necessarily must be a parent to come up with good parenting strategies, but surely you would have more understanding of what the parents feel if you do. Perhaps her routines wouldn’t be so ruthless if she were a mother herself.

By: knittingnoob

knittingnoob — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 14:28:52 +0000

One thing our pediatrician told me last week was that their little tummies are the size of a walnut and they “eliminate” every hour to hour and a half. I can’t possibly see how feeding every 4 hours could be good! Especially not by bottle.

I’m on my third child now and we are a sling and co-sleeping family. She’s colicy and the sling settles her down most times. In fact, without that sling I’d be holding her constantly. She feeds when she is hungry, though I’ve yet to need to feed in public, I try to time it so I don’t have to. I did the same with the first two, and neither of them actually wanted to be held when they got older.

I really think what is best is what works for your family. You’ll figure it out!

By: aliasmother

aliasmother — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 14:16:00 +0000

This is so interesting. Since this is my first kid, I’m wary of making too many predictions lest Fate show her rollicking sense of humor after my baby is born.

That said…

I think there are two factors that come into play when figuring out the “how to parent” thing. One is your family style. If you are a relaxed, go-with-the-flow kind of family, then trying to strictly structure the baby’s schedule doesn’t make any sense and it might be easier to keep the baby close and fit its needs in when possible. But if you are the kind of family that eats breakfast at 7, lunch and noon, dinner at 6, bedtime at 10, no questions asked, no exceptions, then trying to get the baby on a schedule would be less stressful for everyone.

The other factor is the “parent the kid you have” philosophy. I knew a family once that was highly organized–the kind of people that never lost the keys and scheduled their vacations a year out. They adopted their first son and he was just as detail-oriented and precise as they were and everything was great. But their second adopted son was a sunny-faced wild man that wouldn’t stay in a routine for love or money. They were absolutely panicked until they realized that what worked with the first son was just not going to work with the second. They loosened up for him while keeping some structure for their eldest, and got along pretty well.

That’s my biggest problem with these baby-rearing theories. They seem to believe that all babies will react the same way. But they won’t, because babies are people and people are different. So I guess I’m in the “trust yourself” camp.